VALLETTA — After what sources describe as “the most passionate parliamentary debate since the great pastizzi tax proposal of 2016,” a cross-party committee has unanimously voted to designate the plastic bag caught in a tree as the official National Flower of Malta.
The decision, which comes after seven years of deliberation involving botanists, cultural historians, environmentalists, and one very confused florist, was announced this morning by the Minister for National Identity, who struggled to maintain composure during the press conference.
”We considered many beautiful candidates,” said Minister Marija Borg. “The Maltese Rock Centaury, the Maltese Pyramidal Orchid, the Widnet il-Baħar. All wonderful. But ultimately, the committee felt that no other flora better represents the Maltese landscape, the Maltese spirit, and the Maltese relationship with waste management than the plastic bag lodged permanently in a carob tree.”
The specific bag chosen as the prototype — a faded Scotts Supermarket bag from approximately 2014 — has been hanging from a carob tree on the outskirts of Żebbuġ for over a decade, surviving multiple storms, two attempted removals, and what locals describe as “at least one direct lightning strike."
"That bag is more resilient than half the people I know,” said Tumas Galea, 71, who lives near the tree. “It’s been there longer than three governments. My grandchildren have grown up with that bag. It’s family at this point.”
Environmentalists have expressed mixed reactions. “On one hand, this is clearly a satirical indictment of Malta’s waste management infrastructure,” said Dr. Carmen Attard of Friends of the Earth Malta. “On the other hand, I’ve driven from Mellieħa to Marsaxlokk and counted forty-seven bags in trees, so maybe it genuinely is our most common flora.”
The Royal Botanical Society has reluctantly agreed to include the plastic bag in its official registry of national flowers, filed under “Sacculus plasticus maltensis” with the notation “perennial, wind-pollinated, non-biodegradable.”
New €2 commemorative coins featuring the bag are expected to enter circulation by September. The design shows the bag mid-flutter, with the motto “Dejjem Hemm” (Always There) inscribed below.
The Scotts Supermarket chain has declined to comment, though sources say they are “quietly proud.”