VALLETTA — The Maltese government has announced a new policy requiring all workers to take a mandatory siesta every day. This decision comes after a shocking discovery that employees performed remarkably well when accidentally locked in their offices during lunchtime, thanks to a mix-up with the local pastizzija.
The experiment began when government officials noticed a spike in productivity after a group of workers found themselves trapped in their office for an extra hour due to a pastizzi delivery gone wrong. The pastizzija miscommunicated the order, leading to a sudden influx of spinach and ricotta pastizzi that had to be consumed right away.
”We didn’t know what hit us! Suddenly, the work was done and everyone was happy, despite being locked in like sardines!”
In an effort to harness this newfound productivity, Minister of Employment Karmenu announced that all businesses must implement a two-hour siesta period during lunch, ensuring employees are locked in until they eat their ħobż biż-żejt and recover their energy.
But Why Siestas?
A recent study showed that workers who were stuck in their offices displayed 120% more productivity than usual. “If this means we’ll finally get traffic cleared during lunch hour, then I’m all in for it!” said Marija, a traffic officer.
”It’s like a festa fireworks display! Everyone is just waiting, then boom, suddenly there’s so much work done.”
Despite concerns about how this will affect work-life balance, experts suggest that siestas may just be the way forward. “Look, we’re Maltese. We need our pastizzi and our naps. It’s our right!” claimed Carmen, a productivity expert.
At press time, the Planning Authority was seen reviewing blueprints for new office designs that will include extra locks for maximum siesta efficiency.