VALLETTA — In a revolutionary move to boost the local economy, the Maltese government has unveiled the new ‘Dine with a Documented Mummy’ program. Starting next month, tourists will be able to enjoy traditional rabbit stew while seated next to a 2,500-year-old mummy imported from a rival Mediterranean island.
”Mela, we have everything here: history, culture, and now, a mummy!” declared Minister of Tourism, Pawlu Vella, during the press conference. The mummy, allegedly discovered in an exciting excavation on the shores of Gozo, was acquired in a secret trade deal that has left archaeologists scratching their heads — and possibly their wallets.
Authentic Mummy and Authentic Instagram Moments
Tourists will also have the opportunity to snap selfies with the mummy, ensuring both archaeological authenticity and the birth of a scandalous new Instagram trend. “It’s like the Mona Lisa of mummies!” said visiting tourist, Marija, who plans to post a photo with her rabbit stew and the mummy with the caption, ‘Dinner date goals’.
”I just hope the mummy doesn’t steal my food,”
The Dining Experience will take place at historical sites around Malta, including the Hypogeum and various catacombs. Tourists and mummies will dine under the flickering candlelight as they indulge in rabbit stew and ħobż biż-żejt.
Not everyone is convinced this is a good idea. Archaeologist Karmenu Zammit said, “I’m all for tourism, but is dining next to a preserved body really what we should promote? What’s next, the Skeleton Supper Club?”
Despite the controversy, the program is expected to bring a big boost to the local economy. “We’ll have tourists from all over biting into history and rabbit stew!” exclaimed Vella, licking his lips at the thought.
At press time, the mummy was still waiting for confirmation on whether it will be compensated for its time spent dining with unsuspecting tourists.